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Posts Tagged ‘PTSD’

Present Trauma

I’ve been trying to come up with something to write about this past week. About January 6th specifically. Try as I might, I’m not finding the words. There are a lot of feelings but so many words have been written about it since and I’m sure will be written about that day for years to come, that my words seem inadequate, to say the least.

Feelings. I’m feeling in shock. Traumatized. Despondent. Hopeless. Yet there is also some hope mixed in there. Hope that this is the beginning of righting our country’s course and hope that the anticipated continued violence and unrest doesn’t materialize. Fear. Fear that such violence and unrest will actually continue for months to come. That’s a pretty scary thing to face. And I’m afraid it’s a very real probability. This week seems to have unleashed the evils that have been brewing for many years, even before the current presidency. It was all there, hiding, waiting to be given some permission, some legitimacy, and that’s exactly what this president did.

Treason? Insurrection? Sedition? He’s guilty of all of them. And we are the ones who suffer. He will leave the presidency and we will be paying him a lifelong pension, lifelong secret service protection, and a hefty travel budget. He doesn’t deserve any of it. That is a good excuse for impeachment. It won’t remove him from office but it will strip him of those benefits and of any pardons, or self-pardons. At least thatl’s what the experts say.

There’s so much to be said about this. I’m sure words will not be spared. But we also need to take care of ourselves. What we witnessed and what we’ve read about the Capitol takeover is traumatizing. We’re in shock. Even if we don’t realize it, we are all in some kind of shock.

Take care of yourselves. Be nice to yourselves. Take time away from the news. Be kind, especially to yourself.

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Let It Go; Forget It

The first time was after I was assaulted and held at knife point by a couple of teen thugs. My pants were ripped and the buttons torn off of my shirt. I was mauled. I was scared to death. When it was all over, I knew I was okay but the fright and the panic lasted for days and weeks and months. I tried to get past it. I tried. I really did. But it would come rushing back at me at the most unexpected moment. And instead of holding me or comforting me, I was told to forget it.

Then there were the missed miscarriages. Each time I was devastated. Each time I was broken inside. Each time I was barely hanging on for the sake of my other children. Months later, it was better but it would come flooding back and drag me down. Again, I was told to forget it, let it go. It wasn’t easy but I tried.

I really tried. Now I wonder if I had been allowed to grieve and cry and express my outrage and devastation, would I be better now? Or would these memories come flooding over me forty and twenty-eight years later? I know the memories would still come back but I think I might be better. I guess I won’t ever know.

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Post Traumatic Stress Syndrome happens when a person experiences or witnesses a traumatic event such as an accident, a death, a physical or sexual assault, war, famine, etc., that causes terror, fear, or feelings of helplessness and loss of control. These feelings interfere with the normal every day life of the person and can last months, years, or entire lifetimes.

How does this fit in with abuse? Abuse is a traumatic event, whether experienced as a victim or as an observer. Incidences of abuse can cause post traumatic stress syndrome in which the person feels anger, nervousness, helplessness, anxiety and other feelings that can recur, keeping them from living a normal, productive life. The person will often relive the events surrounding the trauma. They just cannot get past it.

Treatment can include medication or counseling, and often includes both components in an effort to relieve the person of the physical and emotional symptoms to get back to their normal life.

From my research, it appears that the PTSD caused by physical, emotional, or sexual abuse (or witnessing it) is the most difficult to treat. The events that caused the PTSD were in most cases, ongoing, long-lasting, and very damaging.

For more posts on the topic of Abuse, click here.

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