2021, that is. It’s here. I’m less excited and more apprehensive than most about the start of the year. I guess it’s because I know we are not out of the dark yet. In fact, I’m sure we will see things get more bleak before we see any kind of light at the end of the tunnel. I’m just hoping that my family and my friends manage to get through to that light. I know it will be months. I was, at one point, optimistic that I would get to go to Seattle for the birth of my fifth grandchild in April but now I’m thinking it will be closer to Labor Day before it is considered anywhere near safe to go up there. And that’s depressing.
I think that is what is getting to me the most. I see one daughter that lives nearby but we see each other with masks on and lots of space between us. I want to hug her and see her beautiful smile but that won’t be for awhile longer. And my son and his family in Seattle, well I haven’t seen them since December 26 of 2020. That’s way too long. I’m missing them.
I don’t go to stores. Not even the grocery store. When I have to get my monthly money order for rent, I ask my daughter to go for me or if I don’t see her when I need to get it, I run in to Customer Service at closing time when there is no one in the store. No post office. No bank. No pharmacy. At some point I have to figure out how to sign up for grocery pickup or delivery. It’s more complicated for me because only certain stores in my state are authorized to accept EBT for anything but in person purchases so I am limited. I’m lucky that so far, people in my Buy Nothing group have been dropping off food and groceries to me when they have extra. That is what keeps me going, plus my daughter gets me some groceries if she is going to see me around the time of her shopping trips. We are in a bubble so at least I get to see her and the kids often. That’s my plus. Those kids keep me going!
And now that January is here, I get to start using my new Medicare account. I have to pick doctors and hopefully get my prescriptions set up because I missed December meds due to not having Medicare set up yet. So that is something to look forward to. I really don’t often look forward to doctors but I haven’t seen any since last January and so much has gone unaddressed. It’s time to start taking care of those issues.
Another plus during the past year is that a friend asked me to edit his fifth novel. That cash kept me going through several months. And it also gave me a good feeling of doing something positive to help myself and my friend. Hopefully he will write another this year that I can edit! Yay!
I seem to not have a lot of energy these days. I am sleeping most of the day away, every day, except when I go see the kids at my daughter’s. I know it is partly depression and that’s one of the things I need to ask a doctor about…increasing the dose of my anti-depressants. I think that will help.
Anyway. That’s it for this January first of the year that will hopefully bring us out of the darkness, sooner than later!
[I don’t see a way to tag these posts. This whole thing is so different. Give me some time to figure it all out!]
Wasted Days And Wasted Nights 