What do you do when someone dies and they are in you address book or contacts or Facebook feed?
I struggle with this all the time. I still won’t get rid of the address book that I used over thirty years ago when my brother died. His name and address and phone are in there and I can’t bring myself to get rid of it even though none of the addresses are any good.
And then there’s Facebook where my other brother’s name pops up. And where my friend Lydia’s (who died in January) name, picture and comments keeps popping up in my Memories Feed.
When I was updating my old phone yesterday (my most recent phone died so I am resurrecting my previous phone) I came across phone numbers for my one of my brothers who died awhile back. And some of my friends who are no longer with us, Lydia, Sally, Dan, Jody, and some others. I couldn’t bring myself to delete them from my phone.
Of course, this means that I will keep seeing their names and pictures. Yes, I get sad when I see them and they aren’t here anymore. Sometimes I can’t keep myself from tearing up. I know that I should think of good times with them but that’s tough. I eventually do but the tears still come.
What do you do?
I keep old address books, too. I don’t know why. It’s the same reason I keep my blogroll even though I keep telling myself to get rid of it. At least two of the bloggers on there have died, and I feel like I’m erasing them if I delete the blogroll page. I know that’s not true, and maybe in time I’ll be ready to deal with those things.
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I wouldn’t get rid of them either… I’d find it hard… I have friends on Facebook who are no longer with us… passing away at young ages. .. but it keeps them a little alive at least…
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It is hard. In paper form I’ve kept them until it was time to update. In digital? I haven’t deleted and since it all moves with me I guess I’ll always keep them…
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Deleting them from our social media makes me feel as though they never existed and were not part of us. So they continue to pop up unexpectantly and when they do, I feel like crying.
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I guess different people handle things in different ways. It disturbed me to trip over my mom’s contact information after she passed away. Finally one day I had to let it go.
It was difficult to do, but I had to do it for me.
I have a few very dear friends I’ve lost in the past couple of years and their accounts still exist on Facebook. Getting the reminders to wish them a happy birthday bothers me.
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